I wrote this on a whim while supper simmered. I usually man/woman the b-b-q, but Friday we ate in.
I had not the energy, nor the enthusiasm to NOT burn dinner.
The day began as usual, until the extreme warm temperatures that Wyoming is good at arose.
The kids went to town for haying paraphernalia with Dad, while the littlest widget remained close to Mom.
Due to the extreme heat, she and I dreamed up the perfect COOL project for entertainment purposes. “Let’s paint the hallway,” we said.
Let it be known, I am not Dutch! No offense to the Dutch, I have one living in my bunk-house as we write. Therefore, I mean this in the most figurative sense; I am very Dutch when it comes to spending and being thrifty. (A grave lesson to all ranch women across history.)
Alright already, the point: I was given a gallon of paint. Benjamin Moore’s Toasted Pecan, mind you. We’re talking a $30 gallon paint. I must use it wisely.
In all actuality, Toasted Pecan does not do the color justice. For descriptive imagery I shall refer to the paint color as Burned Pecan, because the color is a deep dark chocolate/poop brown and quite close to the shade above on the brushes. But it was FREE!
Therefore, it will suffice to decorate my wall for, perhaps, the remainder of this decade. So, here we are: my 3 YO widget, two six-week old puppies, their mom and one baby Prong-Horned Antelope painting the hallway.
First we must open the paint and stir, right? My widget, far to eager to get paint on her brush does not wait for the stirring nonsense. Half of the wall and most of the floor is brown before I have paint poured into the pan. No worries! (I do intend to replace the floor come winter.)
One pup runs to the bedroom looking for a place to pee? I run after, leaving my paint covered shoes behind. Little Bean, the Antelope, sleeps quietly in the middle of the hallway.
The pup’s mom runs behind the widget, collecting toys that have escaped her grasp, to gnaw. I immediately declare that this is the one number to remove from the painting equation, the mama dog.
No screen door to shut, the dog won’t stay out voluntarily, nor the pups, nor the goat. It’s them, or I suffer fumigation. I choose their company.
Brown paint now covers the widget’s hands and forearms, the floor, the wall, the door frame, widget’s legs, my legs and the side of the Antelope (applied with precision and aim from a 3 Year Old’s foam wand).
Boredom must be the inevitable outcome of this hallway party for someone. All that is necessary on my behalf, is patience and quick thinking. Or no thinking at all at this point, obviously!
The exit, is the clear option for all involved and I have made the choice enticing. Books, toys and living animals are placed in the cool shade for aesthetic appeal. The puppies, though, require forceful persuasion. And once the door is closed they protest endlessly.
I paint like a mad-hatter for a good hour and get most of the hall-way covered in brown, before the creatures return (every last one )with the widget trailing behind. The task, mostly, completed. Their company then, should be cute?
And it is, until… The Antelope walks through the roller pan!
Now, most of you have not spent quality time with a Prong-Horned Antelope. And if you have, then you can vouch for the fact that they do NOT care to be picked up off of the ground. So, at this point, not only did I have flailing hooves, splattering paint, and a screaming little girl who thought that I was strangling her best friend. I had white antelope hair covering the fresh brown paint.
It was 5 o’clock somewhere!